Searching for someone who can lie down with me on a beach, underneath the blinking stars, and just talk for the whole night...
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the following post is quoted from my friend's blog @ http://iceattitude.blogspot.com/
Tuesday, July 29
today luey chun and i were at the class bench and two j2s came up to us and asked us to spare them a minute to do a survey. we agreed, and the first question was: when was the first human being born? 4.5 billion years ago or 6000 years ago? i found it weird, then upon reading the next few questions i realized that i had been tricked into a proselytization session (kudos to these people for thinking up such clever techniques to try to convince me not to go to hell).
i was waiting for a friend, so i didn't mind just sitting there, smiling and listening to the two of them telling me that reading the bible would change my life forever. i mean, there is an absolute standard with regard to the quality of your life isn't there? like the number of friends you have on facebook (assuming you do know who the hell most people are), the number of pairs of shoes you have (i suddenly feel my self-esteem take a great dip when i realize that i only have two pairs of shoes) and maybe how many hamburgers you can gobble down in a minute? (to make it fair, let's standardize it and use Big Mac)
one of the guys was named alex, and this is how part of our conversation went:
alex: what happens after you die?
me: your body decomposes
alex: then, what is the meaning of life?
me: i think the meaning of life is subjective
alex: so, you're objectively saying that the meaning of life is subjective?
me: yes
after my last answer, alex then sneered and tried to hide his condescension, i think i totally deserve it, after all i'm inifinitely inferior to those who have a God to pray to and who think themselves to be the heroic saviours of people like me.
of course, his concealed arguments leave much to be desired. firstly, he suggests that just because you don't believe you will go to heaven after you die, you would not have found the meaning of your life. secondly, if i imply correctly from his polite condescension (please note the irony), he is saying that you cannot objectively say that the meaning of life is subjective. and would he argue that glorifying God is an objective purpose of life?
finally, it is not surprising that he sees Jesus Christ as nothing more than a mental idol; an old man with a white beard, which is the core egoic delusion that spiritual teacher eckhart tolle has talked about. the delusion that only MY god is real, YOURS is false. CHRISTIANITY is real, JUDAISM is false.
the two of them left after failing to provoke any response in me or luey chun. he asked us what we thought, and both of us said that we had nothing to say. he even said, "you can argue if you want." we just looked at each other and smiled, and thanked him for sharing.
if you've been bought so strongly into the cult like he and many countless others have, you will probably be unaffected by this post. after all, who could undermine the foundational beliefs that you have held so dearly to yourself for so long? (and who could undermine your wonderful circle of friends who pray so hard, and believe so deeply?)
at the very least, ask yourself: which is more important to you? popularity or accuracy? then maybe you'll come to find the answer.
p.s. alex deserves credit, though. he used the analogy that we are all highlighters, and that Jesus Christ is the stationery maker. because of this i was reminded that i had to buy an eraser from the bookshop.
which i agree to his point of view to a relatively large extent
Friday, July 25, 2008
half-day, so went LAN with the usual LAN Fed members. 6 of us boarded 67 and chatted rather happily. At the bus stop opposite rgps, a few more hwachong pple boarded the bus, a glimpse of them can tell that they were heading to IRC also, and it was confirmed thereafter. At the high school bus stop, something peculiar happened. There was this very amusing person who boarded the bus (to our very surprise). and of course, he was none other than our high school favourite discipline master, Mr Jeffrey Lim.
Every one of us broke into giggles. the situation then was damn funny. Jeffrey Lim, who was once a strong advocator of anti-LAN for hwachong students and caught countless pple in LAN centres in Coro and Bukit Timah Plaza, had met a dozen of his ex-students who were heading for LAN. we were put in such a peculiar situation that we laughed at this all the way to IRC. We even wondered what would Jeffrey do if he saw a dozen of hwachong pple alighting at the IRC stop later...
As friendly as ever, all of us bid Jeffrey Lim fairwell when we were alighting at the IRC stop. and as usual, we were returned with the distinct Jeffrey smile and goodbye gesture. One by one we alighted, and when the last few had alighted, i think Jeffrey had sensed something was amiss. He must have been thinking, "how come all hwachong boys alight at this bus stop?" Looking us through the glass, he was trying to make some handsigns which resembled a person pressing a game console. In other words, he was asking us if we were going for LAN. Then, we were like duh..., and nodded profusely to him. After knowing this, his face was filled with disappointment. at that time, i don't know whether he wanted to stop us going or not, but even if he had the intention, the door was already closed and the bus had began to move on, and off he went to whatever place that he was going. And left the dozen of us laughing our way to IRC, joking at how helpless and stupid Jeffrey Lim was.
haha jeffrey, we've beat you this time round
Thursday, July 17, 2008
no matter what happens, just wait for me..
please.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
人老了，特别喜欢听旧歌，听起来特别有味道，有感觉。。
可能现在的歌真的不好听吧。。现在的音乐只是为金钱所写的音乐，为潮流所创造的音乐，难怪有个不到十九岁的ah boy已经苦苦地搜索那一首首怀旧金曲，haha...
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
actually i wanted to write this post few days ago, but due to the post-blocks syndrome, i don't have any mood for blogging at all. so here it goes...
I have made a revelation about bgr the other day during the blocks period which sort of enlightened me a lot. Though i had some unpleasant experiences on brg in the past, that's why i have been refraining myself from plunging into any relationship. But when i came to jc, seeing all the couples around me, i got a bit envious, to be honest. i think it is an ego issue. but anyway, the reason why i am still single now, despite my strong urge and envy, is because that the rational side of my mind and my past experiences always remind me that bgr isnt the right thing i need, and plunging into it will be even be detrimental to me. So there was this internal fight in mind with my rational self trying hard to suppress my raging desire. That's why i felt frustrated sometimes, because my mind knows that bgr is not suitable for me right now, but my heart doesn't seem to be in control...
So the fight continues, and victory went to the rational side finally, after an incidence and some golden words from wangzhuo. As usual (i always need to play some sports during test period in order to perform better i guess), i went to play tennis with wang and ma after my maths blocks. In the end, ma threw a wet blanket on us and said that he wanted to mug chem instead. We sort of "disallow" him to mug and forced him to play with us. Then he started to get agitated, but we pressed on. Then came his final outburst, "我已经不能像你们一样这么有空玩啦，我一半的心已经没啦！(cos he's attached),我要去mug啦，". He's so agitated that his face and neck turned red. But somehow, he went to play with us in the end, haha...
This provoked some thoughts in me afterwards.i realised that plunging into a relationship so early is the same as depriving the freedom of your youth. Though bgr can be sweet, romantic, memorable, exciting or whatsoever, it can be painful and troublesome, burdensome and confining. And NOT to forget, you will have three-quarter of life being with your the other half and only one-quarter being in single. so why prolong the three-quarter and shorten the one-quarter? which one is more valuable here? the one in sufficient or deficient?
wa, tell you what, after going through all these thoughts, i suddenly feel so relieved that i could feel a sense of joy. it was geniune joy which one seldom gets... i certainly will not compromise my freedom of youth with an immatured or a fruitless relation man, or even some deep emotional scars...
Then wangzhuo said something the other day which is indeed quite true. He said, "我们现在是最好的啦，可以毫无忧虑地跟girls flirt". haha, why sacrifice something which you can only enjoy for only a few years for something you can do for the rest of your life?
and he also said this, "我们做男人要风流一点，只要不下流就可以了". for those men out there who don't know how to differentiate between “风流” and“下流”, i will always be there for you to clear your doubts.
"wink"